When Trusting God Means Trusting Your Husband

Facing a breach of trust in your marriage? It’s a tough spot to be in, but there’s hope for healing and a path forward.

Using Biblical guidance, this article will walk you through the steps to rebuild trust in your marriage.

From acknowledging the hurt to recommitting to each other, find out how you can mend your relationship and bring it back to a place of love and mutual respect.

With God at the center, even broken trust can be restored. Read on to learn more.

What God Says About Trusting Your Spouse

While the Bible doesn’t specifically talk about “trusting your spouse,” it does provide principles on trust, love, and commitment that can be applied to marriage.

1. Proverbs 3:5-6: “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” This verse emphasizes putting trust in God, which can indirectly help you trust your spouse as you both seek God’s guidance.
2. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7: “Love is patient, love is kind… It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” This classic passage outlines the characteristics of love, including trust.
3. Ephesians 5:22-33: This passage talks about marital roles, highlighting the respect and love that should exist between a husband and wife, forming a basis for trust.
4. Colossians 3:13: “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Forgiveness is a vital aspect of trust.
5. Genesis 2:24: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” This verse speaks to the unity and commitment that should be present in a marriage, laying a foundation for trust.
6. 1 Peter 4:8: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” Love and trust go hand-in-hand, and loving deeply can help in fostering trust.
7. Matthew 19:6: “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” The permanence of marriage calls for a deep level of trust between spouses.

The Bible encourages couples to put God at the center of their relationships, fostering a foundation where trust can grow.

Being trustworthy and trusting others are important traits, not only in our relationship with God but also in our marriage.

How Can I Trust God In My Marriage

Trusting God in your marriage is all about leaning on His wisdom, understanding His design for marriage, and inviting Him into every part of your relationship. Here’s how you can do it:

1. Pray Together: Start by praying with your spouse regularly. Invite God into your joys, struggles, and everyday situations.
2. Read Scripture: Dive into what the Bible says about love, commitment, and forgiveness. Verses like Ephesians 5:25 and Proverbs 18:22 can offer wisdom for a healthy, God-centered marriage.
3. Be Accountable: In a God-centered marriage, both partners are accountable to God for their actions and decisions. This helps you also be accountable to each other, building trust.
4. Seek Godly Counsel: If you’re facing issues that you can’t seem to resolve, don’t hesitate to seek advice from a Christian counselor or a wise mentor who can provide biblical insights.
5. Forgive as You’re Forgiven: Remember that both you and your spouse are human and will make mistakes. Extend the same grace and forgiveness to them that God has given to you.
6. Be Honest and Open: Trust in a marriage is built on honesty. Knowing that God values truthfulness can encourage you to be transparent with your spouse.
7. Put God First: When both partners prioritize their relationship with God, it often leads to a healthier relationship with each other. You’ll both be drawing from a well of divine love and patience.
8. Rely on God in Difficult Times: There will be tough seasons in any marriage. Remember that God is your refuge and strength, and lean on Him during these times. His guidance can bring you through any challenge stronger than before.
9. Celebrate Together: Don’t forget to acknowledge and celebrate God’s blessings in your life and marriage. It’ll remind you of His goodness, reinforcing your trust in Him.
10. Be Patient and Consistent: Building trust takes time. Be consistent in your actions and keep inviting God into your marriage.

Trusting God in your marriage means placing your relationship in His hands, and following His lead. It’s an ongoing process that can bring you closer not just to each other, but also to God.

So go ahead and let Him in; He’s the best partner you can have in building a trusting and loving marriage.

How God Wants Husbands To Treat Their Wives

The Bible has some really clear guidelines about how husbands should treat their wives, so let’s dive in!

1. Love Unconditionally: Ephesians 5:25 says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This is a powerful form of love that’s selfless and sacrificial.
2. Be Understanding: 1 Peter 3:7 tells husbands to “live with your wives in an understanding way.” That means listening, communicating, and trying to see things from her perspective.
3. Show Respect: Ephesians 5:33 states, “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Mutual respect is key in a godly marriage.
4. Provide and Protect: In 1 Timothy 5:8, the Bible mentions that anyone who doesn’t provide for their family has denied the faith. While roles can vary in modern marriages, the idea is to be a dependable support for your wife.
5. Be Faithful: The Ten Commandments in Exodus 20:14 say, “You shall not commit adultery.” Faithfulness builds trust and honors God’s plan for marriage.
6. Be a Spiritual Leader: In Ephesians 5:26-27, husbands are encouraged to help their wives grow spiritually, “to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word.”
7. Value Her Opinions: In Genesis 2:18, women are described as “helpers” suitable for man. This doesn’t mean inferior; it means valuable and complementary. Her input is valuable and should be sought and considered.
8. Do Not Be Harsh: Colossians 3:19 warns husbands not to be harsh with their wives. Kindness and gentleness should be the tone of your relationship.
9. Work Together: Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 talks about the benefits of partnership. Two are better than one, providing emotional, physical, and spiritual support for each other.
10. Keep God at the Center: Finally, remember that a cord of three strands is not easily broken (Ecclesiastes 4:12). Keeping God at the center of your marriage will guide you in how to treat each other in the best possible way.

So, treating your wife the way God intends isn’t just about following rules; it’s about creating a loving, supportive, and God-centered relationship that benefits both of you. How awesome is that?

When Trust In A Marriage Is Broken

When trust is broken in a marriage, it’s a serious matter and not something to take lightly. But there’s hope!

The Bible offers guidance, and from a Christian counseling perspective, here are some steps to consider for healing:

1. Acknowledge the Hurt: Both partners need to acknowledge that a breach of trust has occurred. Ignoring it won’t make it go away.
2. Seek God’s Guidance: Prayer is a crucial first step. Ask God for wisdom, understanding, and a heart willing to follow His path toward healing.
3. Confession and Repentance: The person who broke the trust should openly confess their wrongdoing and genuinely repent, both to God and their spouse.
4. Offer Forgiveness: It’s tough, but Ephesians 4:32 instructs us to be forgiving, “just as in Christ God forgave you.” Keep in mind, forgiveness is a process and takes time.
5. Seek Christian Counseling Alone: Sometimes the issues are too complex to handle on your own. Christian counselors can provide a safe space to explore your feelings and find constructive ways to rebuild trust.
6. Accountability: Both parties should be accountable for their actions moving forward. Transparency can help in rebuilding trust.
7. Transparency: The offending spouse needs to be 100% transparent is all dealing of his/her life for as long as it takes.
8. Work on Communication: Good communication is vital for rebuilding trust. Honest, open dialogues about feelings, expectations, and fears can pave the way for a stronger marriage.
9. Learn and Grow: Use this as an opportunity to grow both individually and as a couple. Dive into Bible studies or Christian books about trust and marriage.
10. Set Healthy Boundaries: Talk to your counselor about healthy boundaries for your situation.
11. Recommit to Each Other: If both are willing, making new commitments to each other can symbolize a fresh start.
12. Remember Love: 1 Corinthians 13:7 says, “Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” Let love guide you through the difficult process of rebuilding trust.

Broken trust doesn’t mean the end of a marriage, but it does mean there’s a lot of work to do to repair it.

With God at the center, sincere repentance, and a commitment to change, trust can be rebuilt. It won’t be easy, but with God, all things are possible (Matthew 19:26).

This is a guest post from my friend Jen …

When Trusting God Means Trusting Your Husband. All married women realize at some point during married life that their husbands are not perfect. As we grow through marriage, we learn that our husbands are just works-in-progress, too, like we are, and as such, they make mistakes from time to time. 

The hard part about being married to an imperfect man is that we are called to trust him and submit to him anyways – even when:

• When he forgets to pay bills
• When he breaks a promise
• When he grows depressed
• When he acts irresponsibly
• When he acts unloving
• When he runs from God like Jonah

Do you find that challenging? 

Because I certainly do! 

When I see evidence that my husband is really struggling in his faith and not walking well with the Lord, I begin to question his judgement and leadership for our family.

Because if I truly trust God, then I believe He will care for our family no matter what decisions my husband makes, no matter what the consequences might be, whether they are decisions I agree with or not. I trust that the Father has placed me under my husband’s umbrella for a reason.

“Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.” Ephesians 5:22-24 (NASB)

Wives, be subject “as to the Lord.” In the same way that we submit to and place our trust in the Lord’s authority, we should also submit to and place our trust in our husband’s authority.

That’s a hard truth to swallow, my sisters in Christ. 

If I trust God, then I trust that He knows what He is doing in my husbands life. I trust that He is still at work in my man. I trust that He will not allow anything into our lives, our marriage, our family, that will fail to result in good for us somewhere down the road.

Because submitting to my husband, means submitting to the Lord. Does that mean I must follow my husband blindly into disaster or even sin?

As my husband’s sister in Christ, I am compelled to speak truth in love into his life. I am compelled to demonstrate my compassion while also asking him to be the man God calls him to be. Furthermore, I am compelled to set my own boundaries when it comes to personal conviction and sin and humbly ask him to respect them. 

At the same time, I can affirm that I trust his leadership because I trust our loving Father.  I can love him even when I feel unloved myself.  I can have compassion on him because I know what it’s like to wrestle with the Lord myself! 

I can become a praying wife who spends time on her knees asking the Father to work mightily in her husband’s heart.

Even though trusting God by trusting my husband might make life uncomfortable for a while, I will ultimately reap the blessing of obedience. 

And my husband will enjoy the blessing of a supportive wife who does her best to understand his work-in-progress status. And our children will see how a couple works through the tough times in married life together rather than growing distant from one another.

What a beautiful lesson.

And I know that for some more than others, what I ask comes at a cost to you. Your past tells you that it’s not safe. Your past tells you to protect yourself at all costs. Your past tells you to nag that man until he does what is right. 

Furthermore, the enemy himself will insert a voice, too. He’ll whisper lies about how unfair it is of God to ask you to be obedient when your husband is not. He’ll tell you to take matters into your own hands instead like Sarah did so long ago. 

He’ll drag you right into the mess if you let him. 

Don’t listen to those lies, friends! 

I’ve been that distrusting, nagging wife. In fact, from time to time I still am, to my disgrace. 

But in all our sixteen years of marriage, I’ve never found that path to actually work. Using my words as a weapon only serves to separate us further from one another, and it leads me into sin. 

What does work?

Prayer. 

Trust. 

Belief in a God who can and will do the impossible in your marriage. 

Trust your husband, not because he’s always trustworthy or because he deserves it, But because you trust a faithful God.

Jen 🙂